Julia Carter Julia.Carter@uwe.ac.uk
Senior Lecturer in Sociology and Criminology
The transformation of love? Choice, emotional rationality and wedding gifts
Carter, Julia; Smith, Daniel
Authors
Daniel Smith
Contributors
Julia Carter Julia.Carter@uwe.ac.uk
Editor
Lorena Arocha
Editor
Abstract
Illouz (2012) claims that love has undergone a great transformation in modernity. The choice of romantic partners occurs through individual decisions disembedded from moral communities. Romantic love becomes a source of the self as one’s beloved affirms our individuality. Yet our choices bring with them the burden of foreclosed possibilities and doubts around ‘the right choice’. Modern romance potentially installs a consumerist ethic of reversibility to our romantic choices. Here we explore the logic and limits to Illouz’s thesis. Through a focus upon ‘wedding gifts’, we find in both cultural imaginaries and social practices of ‘the gift’ a negotiation with Illouz’s transformation of love. Our argument inverts Illouz: the wedding gift helps articulate the annulment of choice, a decision to commit in spite of choice.
Citation
Carter, J., & Smith, D. (2020). The transformation of love? Choice, emotional rationality and wedding gifts. In J. Carter, & L. Arocha (Eds.), Romantic Relationships in a Time of 'Cold Intimacies' (57-79). Palgrave Macmillan (part of Springer Nature). https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-29256-0
Acceptance Date | Jul 4, 2019 |
---|---|
Online Publication Date | Nov 6, 2019 |
Publication Date | 2020 |
Deposit Date | Nov 11, 2019 |
Publicly Available Date | Nov 7, 2021 |
Publisher | Palgrave Macmillan (part of Springer Nature) |
Pages | 57-79 |
Series Title | Palgrave Macmillan Studies in Family and Intimate Life |
Book Title | Romantic Relationships in a Time of 'Cold Intimacies' |
Chapter Number | 4 |
DOI | https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-29256-0 |
Public URL | https://uwe-repository.worktribe.com/output/1705210 |
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Copyright Statement
This is the author's accepted manuscript of a chapter published in Romantic Relationships in a Time of ‘Cold Intimacies’
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